WARNING: i apologize for the horrible writing/formatting/style of this post.
it's kinda just an unorganized rant of how im feeling at the moment and i don't want to ruin the raw-ness of it by editing.
It's been a long while since I've seen the likes of a post with words that isn't from 3 months ago.
I've come to blog a few times recently but when the time comes to begin writing, my words fail me.
but i've begun a new theatre expedition and i think that is what has gotten my creative juices flowing.
so here are some words...FINALLY.
As previously stated, i have a begun a theatre venture.
I am Chiffon in Little Shop of Horrors at the Canyon Theatre Guild.
Although I'm working with the same director at the same place with a few people from the old cast EVERYTHING is different.
In High School Musical i felt like my talent was being lost in a crowd of mediocrity.
High School students who were further along than i was at that age at realizing their love for theatre but who still hadn't completely grown into their potential. (no offense to anyone from that show i love you all!)
but in this show i feel so completely lost.
i feel like the weak link because everyone is so INCREDIBLY talented.
it will no doubt take me a while to be able to accept the fact that i was CHOSEN for this role.
i didn't luck out. the directors liked me and believed that i would help in the show's success.
although every time i have to sing a solo in front of the group i feel like im going to pass out (not to mention every body part shakes, my hands sweat, my face gets hot and i want to throw up) i understand that this is going to be a HUGE learning experience for me and i think the cast has already adopted me as the little sister because i not only look like a child but this is only my 3rd show in LIFE.
i did feel slightly redeemed after i sang the skid row solo and one of the girls came up to me afterwards to tell me that i had a beautiful, soulful voice and she loved listening to me sing.
it felt good but i still feel like a total dud.
im working on it.
