Randomings of January.

Nostalgia is the devil.

I'm serious and this is why. It seems so harmless at first. A little memory here, a chuckle about an embarrassment there and wham-o kablam-o you're on your face getting so mad that you aren't where you thought you'd be. And the thing is it doesn't matter how good or bad your past was! You can be nostalgic about the past when things sucked or when they were great but at the end of the day, you'll most likely end up on the train to "how'd I get here"-land and there are a lot of residents but NO ONE wants to stay there. Unfortunately, a lot of people do stay there, because they can't get out on their own.

I'm not nostalgic though...today, at least. It's only January 10 so it still feels like a new year; what is there to be nostalgic about? We just got here!

Anywho, I'm ready for something new. I'm ready for extraordinary. I used to be afraid that I was the only one who thought that way. That I was the only weird kid on the block who didn't believe her life was supposed to end in working the 9-5 job with a nice house and cute family. I thought I was the only one who couldn't picture a future of normalcy because it didn't feel right. Now, in talking with friends my age, I'm beginning to fear that everyone thinks that way. Is this a generational thing or do I just surround myself with people who are extraordinary dreamers? This isn't actually a rhetorical question either. Can someone please tell me if there are people in this world (20 somethings mainly) whose lives would feel complete if they simply worked a regular job and went home at 5 everyday to their nice little homes. Seriously, does someone still dream that way? I don't mean to make it sound trivial, it's a respectable desire, it really is. I guess I can't step away from the fact that it's totally not what I want, or at least I don't think it's what I want.

Wait.

Maybe at 20 something our parents thought this way? Are your mid-twenties the years where you're supposed to dream like that? And then eventually you either Peter Pan it and stay dreaming or you buckle down and grow up and start living a life of responsibility? Someone, anyone, help me out.

I'd like to take the time to apologize for my first statement and do a little revision. Nostalgia is not the devil. But if you let it go too far, I think it'll do more harm than good.

*Insert heavy sigh* I'm writing this blog on my break from my 9-5 job (that I actually do enjoy, but still). I know the answer at the end of it all is Jesus; I just needed to get it out of my head and onto [virtual] paper.

I can't believe I actually used the words "wham-o kablam-o".

I'm embarrassed and impressed all at the same time.

The obligatory end of the year post

“If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present.”

Goodbye 2013.

You've been good to me.

2013 was not, by any means, the easiest year but it was a year of so much growth for me.

I learned the freedom of vulnerability. I learned how to trust my instincts. I learned how to be a better friend (still working on it) and in turn gained some of the greatest friends I think I've ever had.

I learned a lot about my weaknesses and how far I still have to go. I learned how to accept grace. I learned how to lead others. I learned how to have a good attitude. I learned that I'm more selfish than I thought. I learned that I'm broken (and that it's okay). I learned how to worship. I learned how to genuinely love the presence of God. I learned how to heal. I learned that there is power in love. I learned that my life experiences, though slightly regrettable, are beneficial in relating to others. I learned how perfect God's timing is. I learned how to grieve with others. I learned how to be treated. And above all else, I learned that no matter what happens, God is ALWAYS faithful.

This year had it's ups and downs but at the end of it all, God was always there. I felt an abundance of hope this year. And even as a new year begins, I can say with certainty that I know God is faithful to complete all he said he would. It's easy to think of a new year as new hope, but I look with hope because of all of the good God has done in 2013. There's no 'wishful thinking' needed when Christ is at the center. Christ is hope. So here's to 2014 because it will be filled with the hope that Christ brings, his never ending abundance of love and the promises of his word fulfilled.

Happy New Year.