middle of the ocean

Trust: Firm reliance on the integrity, ability, or character of a person or thing.

This morning in the shower I was thinking, as I often do, about my future. Many thoughts about careers and living situations flooded my mind, but before I could let the stress of not having a plan take over, I simply thought...I'll just trust God with it.
"What a good plan!", I thought. Then I don't have to worry about anything. God's got it and I'll just follow right on down his path and everything will be easy as pie. I'll do everything he asks and I'll end up right where he wants me to be.
and then she lived happily ever after.
NOT!
If only I really could think and act that way.
Soon as I thought of trusting God, thoughts of neglect and huge sacrifice came to mind. Do I really trust God? Or is it simply a cop out for me to not stress and fool myself into thinking that God's gonna believe that I truly trust him.

So my thoughts led me to Peter in Matthew 14:22-33; when Jesus was walking on water and had Peter come out to meet him, ya know, in the middle of the ocean...without a boat!
I was thinking how, so often, I look at Peter and I'm like "Dude, why didn't you trust Jesus? He was right there!" then ohmygosh, I have my own AHA! moment (as Oprah calls it...).
Peter trusts God when he takes that first step onto the water. He sees Jesus standing in the MIDDLE OF THE OCEAN and is like "Ya know, I got this. I'm good." and for awhile he is good, but then he gets distracted. The reality of the situation takes hold of what was once full reliance on Christ, and instead of staying focused on what was keeping him up in the first place, he looks to other things and starts freaking out.

Man, if I had a nickel for every time I've been in Peter's situation (not walking on water, but you catch my drift)...

It's so easy to look at Peter and judge and say things like "Pssh, Christ already proved he was trustworthy when you stepped out of the boat, so why, when things got rough, did you doubt him, ya crazy!?!" (loose translation)
but how many times have we done that EXACT SAME THING?

We step out of our figurative boats and begin the "trusting journey" where we see that things are working out the way God promised it would happen. He's proven his faithfulness and we're chillin' on the water in the middle of the ocean fully relying on God.
Of course we are, because at this point, things are easy.

• You have enough money to pay the rent and eat out a couple times this week.

• The medicine, the doctor gave your mom, is working and the sickness seems to be going away.
• You have a job offer ready for you when you graduate.
• You're enjoying living the single life and going out with your single friends.
  

Then the waves come.

• Money is tight and your car needs to be fixed but you can't afford to do that and pay rent.
• Your mom has an allergic reaction to the pills and is in the hospital because the doctors don't know what's wrong.
• The job is overseas where you know no one.
• The guy you were interested in, suddenly starts avoiding you for no reason at all and you have no idea why.

Where does that firm reliance go? What happened to the worry-free, believing-is-my-specialty, follower of Christ who was trusting in God so effortlessly.

waves happened.

Why is it that I can so easily look to God in the times where everything is going right and say "i know you've got everything under control"? But as soon as a little storm comes along, that trust simply disappears and all that's left is our fear and doubt that distracts us from what was holding us up all along.
As soon as Peter took his eyes off Jesus he began to sink.
We stop focusing on Christ and become distracted by the "wind and waves" of our lives and eventually begin to sink. We all do this. I, most definitely, do it and it's an unfortunate path to take.
Fortunately, my friends, the story doesn't end there.
Just as Peter is sinking in the ocean, he cries out "Lord, save me!"

"Lord, save me!"
Verse 31 says: "Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him." Immediately.

Jesus doesn't lecture Peter about how he could have stayed on the water longer, or tell him how bad of a disciple he is. Rather, Jesus saves Peter. He didn't ask Peter to wear a dunce cap until he admitted what he did wrong. No. Peter called and Jesus came to his rescue.

This isn't an excuse to lose your way and then call on Jesus. But it is a call to action.
A call to be firm relyers(is that a word) on Christ.
We can rest in knowing and be thankful that if our flesh takes over, we can call on our maker and he will come to our rescue.
But I want to live a life where I trust God in a firm reliant fashion.

amen.